It's here!!!

Well girls and boys the big day has arrived!  Ok, so it's the wee hours of the morning but it is officially the 26th!  Manda and I have been sitting chatting for hours and are getting ready to head off to bed shortly.  We need to leave by about 8:00 to get to the hospital by 10:00 (morning traffic northbound to DC is hell).  This is the last time I'll be checking in pre-op.  You won't hear from me again until sometime Thursday at the earliest.  Thank you all for your prayers and well wishes.  I appreciate it.  :-)

Almost time!

I've been busy the past couple days trying to get things ready for Tuesday.  I've done more laundry in the past two days than I've done in the past two months.  LOL  The most fun had to be changing the sheets on the guest room bed while Fluffy remained on the bed - the entire time.  That took some talent.

Tomorrow (erm, tonight) Manda will arrive and stay for the night.  Then in the morning she'll take me to the hospital.

I feel like I still have a million things to do before Tuesday morning, but in essence I know I don't.  The most important thing right now is to remain calm or I won't get any sleep prior to Tuesday.  Sleep?  Hmm, that's definitely a foreign concept to me.  ;-)

Argh! Take 2...

I don't need to rant as much as yesterday, but it's still a rant.  I had my final pre-op visit today.  We went over my test results from the labs and such, and everything looked fine... almost.  My white cell count was high.  I expected that, but had forgotten to tell them that it would probably be high.  How did I know?

A number of years ago (I believe in 2006) I was referred to a hematologist who ran a series of tests to determine why my white count was high - always.  He deduced after a number of tests that my white cell count is higher than average and said that it isn't entirely uncommon.  So he wrote up a report and sent it to my primary care.  I didn't really think about it since.  Until today.

So, I've been set on a mission to get a letter from either my primary care or the hematologist - or both if possible.  The problem is that the records are in both office's archives.  The hematologist's office seemed far more helpful that my primary care.  If worse comes to worse I'm going to head over to the primary care Saturday and see Sherri.  She'll personally write me the letter, which is good.  One way or another I will get this letter!

After all the drama on the phone with the two different offices, I got to drive home in rush hour traffic in sleet. *sigh*  I stopped at the store on the way home to stock up on things I'll need next week.  I now have lots of broth, smooth low-fat cream-style soups, sugar-free jello and sugar-free pudding.  Yum!

In a nutshell, I'm ready.  Now to get all the doctors lined-up and in order.  ;-)

Argh!

Be forewarned, rant ahead!

As my final pre-op visit with Dr. Tran is tomorrow I had called his office yesterday to verify they had received all my test results and the medical release from Dr. Carter.  Leslie (the amazing surgery coordinator for the office) called me this morning and told me several things were missing - including the release.  Now I saw Dr. Carter sign the release, and she assured me that everything would be faxed.  I called her office and spoke with her nurse who assured me she had personally faxed everything.  I was polite and said that sometimes this happens and read off the list of missing items.

Now there were probably 6 or 8 test results that Dr. Tran's office hadn't received.  Two of them were types/levels of thyroid tests.  Her response to why they weren't run was, "The primary test was normal so we didn't see a need to run them."  Apparently I'm supposed to be stupid enough not to realize that they wouldn't know the first test was fine until they got the results back.  But instead of playing that card I said to her, "My surgeon ordered those tests to be done and they should have been regardless."  She didn't have a response to that.  So she said they leave a prescription at the front for me so I could have the remaining tests run.  When I got to the office (a good hour later) the RX still wasn't at the front.  So I asked for the RX and copies of all the blood work results, EKG, urinalysis and the medical release.  The nurse wanted to know why I wanted all that and I informed her it was so I could take it with me to my appointment tomorrow.  Grrrr...

At least the lab that drew the blood is reputable and assured me they would have the results to Dr. Tran no later than Friday.  Thankfully Leslie told me as long as they have them by Monday everything will be fine.

I spent the rest of my day making an appointment to have maintenance done on the Jeep, and then a trip to the dump.  One more load of cardboard boxes and 6 bags of garbage down.  ;-)  Let's see how much more I can accumulate during the house cleaning process.  LOL

One Week!!!

It doesn't seem possible that my long journey is nearing it's completion.  One week from today I will be having my surgery.  As a matter of fact, by this time next week I will probably be in my hospital room zonked out on pain killers.  LOL

Today was the nutrition class/seminar.  There were about 10 of us there - all within two weeks of our surgery.  I learned a few things but much of it was reiterating things I've already been told and read.  I'll see the nutritionist again Thursday when I meet with Dr. Tran.

I began the attempt to straighten up the house tonight.  I made a small dent, but any dent is good.  LOL  I have to make it somewhat presentable before Manda arrives Monday.  :-)

Rainy days and Mondays...

Ok, so the rain today didn't get me down but it also didn't inspire me to do much.  I did have a really wonderful afternoon with my friend Gena.  She came over to visit for a couple hours.  We chatted about some of the things she's been finding since her surgery and about the different products that are available to help us get our protein. Plus I got to show her some of my photos she hadn't seen before.  Overall it was a really enjoyable time.  Even Mina had a good time playing with her. :-)

Tonight I'm relaxing.  I just got off the phone with Manda to confirm how we're working next week.  We'll talk again the end of the week after I see Dr. Tran.  We just need a better idea of how long the surgery will take so we can determine whether or not she'll be able to stay until I've been moved into recovery.  If she can't I'll get Gena to come up when she gets off work.  Regardless everything seems to be covered.  Well nearly everything...

I'm still trying to decide if I need someone to come stay with me for a few days post-op.  I know Gena is more than willing and Manda would if she didn't have to be at work in DC each night.  I just hate feeling like a burden to my friends.  There may be one other possibility, but it would be a bit more work to pull it off so it's probably out of the question.

Other than that one little "hiccup" everything is going really well.  Over the next couple days I need to concentrate on cleaning up the guest room and laundry.  It's all falling into place now.  :-)

9 Days!

Wow!  It doesn't seem possible that I am a mere 9 days out from surgery!  It seems like I just began the journey a few weeks ago, when I actually started the initial inquiries the end of September.  Wow.  I am so thankful to have my family and such great friends who are supporting my decision.  It really is an entire change of lifestyle and I'm ready for it.

One neat thing that happened this weekend bears mentioning.  I was checking my MySpace account and was surprised to see I had a message in my inbox.  I didn't recognize the person who sent it, but it contained a link to an article and the question of whether or not I was the person in said article.  OMG.  It was an article in the Freelance Star from when I was all of 5 years old!  If you'd like to take a look at the article, you can find it here. Veronica said she found the article when she did a Google search of her name, and then did a search for me.  She said she thought my profile pic looked enough like the Sarah in the picture that she took a chance.  Isn't it amazing how you don't see/speak to someone for 30 years and suddenly there they are?  Amazing the world we live in now!

Nerves

I think tonight is the first time my nerves have really kicked-up.  I don't believe it is entirely the surgery but a mixture of things.  I'm going into the surgery as prepared as possible but I still find myself having fears about the months post-surgery.  I don't feel a concern over complications or problems with getting the nutrients I need, it's more a fear over the fact that there is still so much I need to do in other aspects of my life and I actually feel the time to get the completed before returning to work is running out.  I keep reminding myself that everything will get done in due time and not to let it stress me, but tonight I really feel it nagging at the back of my mind.  Anyone have any suggestions on how to work through this?

Whoops!

Today I had my first real experience with how much energy I can expend (at one time) with the lowered calorie intake.  Who knew that dumping the kitties' kibbles into bins and changing their box was so taxing?  Apparently it is because I got lightheaded and actually wasn't sure if I could make it to a chair in time.  (I did.)  So now I know to be a bit more careful.  Now keep in mind I had originally planned to only change the box, but as I was moving stuff around to sweep up scattered litter I found that "she who shall remain nameless" had gnawed into the new bag of kibbles and there was a small pile of them accumulating on the floor.  I guess this is my payback for wanting them to eat the older food first before I dumped the new bag into the container.  She was appropriately scolded, btw.

I also came to a conclusion today that my memory really isn't what it should be.  Actually, I began formulating that thought last night when I couldn't remember how many of the five liquid items I'd had during the day.  *sigh*  So today I added a spot on my white board with the days of the week so I can put tic marks each time I ingest one of the liquids.  It's sad that things have come to this.  Right now I'm enjoying a little before soup jello.  Sugar free orange flavor to be exact.  I am a bit disappointed that it isn't more orangey.  I think I prefer the lime. :-)

Got hunger?

I really don't have much on my mind regarding the surgery today.  However, last night I found that my stomach would not stop growling.  I had already ingested my alloted servings for the day and no amount of water and gum chewing was helping.  Finally I gave up and went to be in hopes that I could sleep.  (I eventually did.)  Today hasn't been too bad hunger-wise.  I find it interesting that I had more problems last night than the previous one.  I guess my body was just trying to do all it could to make me eat.  Well it's not gonna work.  I am committed to this!

Today my thoughts have mostly been on Haiti and it's people.  I have done what I can by donating to two different organizations providing aid to the nation.  I look at the news reports and images and just find myself in tears.  Please, find it in your hearts to say a prayer for these people - even if you cannot help them financially.

Raspberry lemonade and mint gum do not mix...

In an effort to find ways of curbing my hunger I've taken to chewing sugar-free gum.  Tonight I have come to the not so amazing conclusion that sugar-free raspberry lemonade and mint gum do not blend well - at all.  Guess I'll need to stick to bubble gum flavor with my raspberry lemonade.  ;-)

Day two of the restricted diet has gone well.  I did feel the fatigue this morning from the lowered calorie intake, but once I got myself up and moving it wasn't too bad.  I managed to clean out the fridge and freezer.  It was something (at least regarding the freezer) that should have been done some time back.  It's so empty in there now, I think there is an echo.  LOL  It was a bit rough going through the grocery store knowing that it's going to be some time before I can buy a number of the things I've enjoyed eating.  Today it was a few non-food items and then a couple packages of sugar-free jello and sugar free popsicles.  They're the only things besides the special food that I can eat during these days leading up to my surgery.

Today I also found myself deeply moved by the situation in Haiti.  A magnitude 7 earthquake in California would be horrible, but in one of the poorest countries of the world it is devastating.  The images that are coming from Port-au-prince and the surrounding areas are graphic to say the least: bodies lying in the street and in the debris.  Please, if you are able I ask you to donate to one of the relief programs.  More people will die from lack of water and lack of medical attention/equipment.  Also, say a prayer for those affected by this disaster - including the families and friends of the victims who are living outside Haiti.

Two weeks!

Today is officially the two week mark until my surgery!  It also marks the first day of the pre-op diet.  It's not too horrific, but I'd love to have something to actually chew besides the one "meal" bar each day.  We are allowed to have sugar free jello and sugar free popsicles as well - up to 3 a day.  I was glad to have some sugar free jello in the fridge.  Why didn't I remember it tasting so good?  LOL  I guess I need to go to the store tomorrow.

In order to keep things real I've decided to openly admit that as of today my current weight is 327.8, which is only two pounds less than when I started Weight Watchers in September, 2008.

These are the two photos I took to begin my journey in photos.  So yes, there will be more to come.

The "Last" Supper

One of the biggest misconceptions I keep reading about regarding WLS is people feeling the need to have that "last" meal that they will never be able to eat again.  I'm actually to the point where I am finding that attitude quite annoying.  There is no "last time" for anything.  Once the body has healed and the doctor has given the green light for going back to foods of a normal consistency there is no reason you can't have a bite or two of a beloved food.  The thing to remember is you will not be able to eat an entire slice of cake or pie any longer because your body will not be able to cope with the amount of sugar in those items.  The same goes for all processed carbs.  Plus, some people find their bodies don't ever tolerate some foods again (some say red meat is completely out, while others can't eat lettuce/salads).  That is something I considered very closely prior to making my decision.  I realized there is not a single food that I am not willing to give up for life if need be.

With that in mind I did decide to have one thing today that I won't ever be able to enjoy in it's entirety again:  a milkshake from Chik-fil-a.  However, there is a recipe in Before & After that is said to be an acceptable (re: sugar free) version of a Dairy Queen Blizzard.  That works for me.  There are quite few things in my fridge that will be getting tossed because they will go bad before I can even consider eating them.  They are all leftovers so I don't feel as if it is a total waste of money.  Plus, if they aren't in the fridge I have less likelihood of wanting to eat them.  Removing temptation is a huge step.

Over the next two weeks I'll be stocking up on foods that I can have during the liquid and puree stages (usually the first two to three weeks post-surgery).  I already have several resealable containers of stock, so that's a plus.  I've also ordered some of the non-flavored protein powders to mix with things such as stock.  Getting enough liquids, protein and vitamins are going to be my main goal when I come home.  I also ordered some other types of protein mixes and pre-made drinks to sample.  I've been lucky that some of the companies make travel sized pouches.  That will be a life saver when I'm traveling.

Today I had the appointment with the pulmonologist as well as a required breathing test.  All went well with the test, although it did show that I've already begun to have decreased lung capacity due to the excess weight.  He feels that after I begin to lose significant weight (50+ lbs) it should begin to correct itself.  He did provide me with another spray to use to help with the rhinitis problems.  It's just a sample size but he said it may help me breathe a bit better through my nose up until the surgery.  We also discussed the results of the sleep studies and feels that is is highly possible that post surgery the sleep apnea may go away.  I certainly hope so.  We arranged a follow-up appointment for the beginning of May.

I'm starting to become a bit nervous and excited as the date grows closer.  I realized today that I'm more upset than I thought over my mom not being here for my surgery.  I don't deny her health is important, but I find myself really upset that none of my family will be with me during this important day of my life.  I know all my friends will be with me in spirit and that is reassuring... it just isn't the same.

T-02:57 until I am on the pre-op diet.  Time to enjoy nibbling a few more things and drinking that last lonely Sprite in the fridge.  LOL

Everything happens for a reason...

I am thankful for the wonderful friends I have.  The other night after my panic over Mom not coming up for my surgery I sent a message to one of my friends.  Despite the fact that Amanda will have to work in DC the week of my surgery, she is going to come stay at my house to make sure I get to/from the hospital.  I definitely have some angels looking out for me.

I'm still working my way through the book I mentioned before.  I have learned some important things so far, and I've gotten some ideas of things to do in order to stay mentally focused.  I'm really glad I bought the book before my nutritional seminar on the 19th because it's given me time to read through it and formulate questions.

So far there is really only one thing that I'm mildly concerned about and that is the fact that I won't be able to take ibuprofen or Excedrin again.  They are the only medications that give me any relief from my headaches.  I realize with ibuprofen and other NSAIDS that there is a higher risk of ulcers, but I know the WLS isn't aware of how much I take on a regular basis (and have for a number of years) without any problems.  That is something I'll have to speak with him about in our last pre-op one-on-one session.

Tomorrow (well, technically later today) I'm having dinner with Gena and her clan.  We're finally getting to celebrate Christmas since I was sick during the holidays.  I'm so happy with her success thus far since her surgery on December 15.  She had a tiny problem with an infection from a filter they put in her neck (due to a history of blood clots), but she's on the mend from that now.

Monday I meet with the pulmonologist to be assessed regarding the CPAP.  Then he has to do my final pre-op test which is a breathing functions test.  Considering everything else has gone well I'm not expecting any difficulties.  Tuesday is the big day I begin my two week pre-op diet.  That should be interesting.  I've been told to expect to be rather weak the first two days due to my body acclimating to the lowered calorie intake.  So I will plan to stay home those two days.

I still feel confident that I've made the right decision, and I'm more excited than ever about my fast-approaching surgery!

Why?

I would love to know why when things are going really well someone feels the need to throw a wrench into it.  That's what has happened tonight.


Ever since last month when I told my mom I was having the surgery and that I want her here for it, I was under the impression that she and Fred would be here.  She did nothing to suggest otherwise.  Tonight I spoke with her and it turns out that she hasn't been entirely open with me, and now her doctor is basically forbidding her from making the trip.  He is concerned with the amount of time she'll be in the car for the drive here and back, and how long she'll be away from his care.  Away from his care... yeah.  He can't even entirely figure out what is wrong with her leg (an on-going problem for at least two years now) to properly heal it.  But being angry at him doesn't help or change things.


Now I'm scared to death at how I'm going to coordinate getting to/from the hospital for my surgery.  Gena will have already returned to work and they aren't going to allow her to take the time off, and I don't really have anyone else in this area whom I can ask.  I know Gena will come stay with me for a few days once I'm home, but my main concern is the initial travel surrounding my surgery.  It is times like these I truly dislike living so far away from everything.


However I think the worst part is that I'm now second guessing things.  I'm trying to tell myself that everything will work out fine, but right now all I want to do is cry.

"Before and After"

Last night I began reading a book that is recommended by the nutritionist.  Normally I wouldn't have found out about this book until I attend the nutrition seminar on the 19th, but as my friend Gena had her surgery last month she told me about it.  The book is called Before & After by Susan Maria Leach.  The part I read last night is Susan's journal entries from prior to her surgery up through the 18 month post-surgery time.  At times while reading her story I started to cry.  I know what this woman has gone through.  I've been there.  Hell, I'm still there.  I actually find some of myself in her story - and not just the obesity similarity.  Like her I have the mindset that I am making a lifestyle change and there is no room for cheating.  I have no desire to see just how much sugar my post-op body will be able to handle just so I can eat things I shouldn't.  I am actually eager to embark on my new life, and willing to make the necessary changes.

The next section of the book discusses questions and answers regarding weight-loss surgery, and then there is a very large section of recipes that Susan has created that are "safe" for post-bariatric surgery patients.  Gena suggested not reading the recipes until after the surgery because she found herself dreaming she'd eaten and waking up in a panic thinking she actually had.  Those must be some serious pain drugs they give in the hospital.  LOL

I have one other recommended book as well:  Eating Well After Weight Loss Surgery.  I had glanced through Gena's copy and think this book will be fantastic.  It contains a lot of recipes, but to me one of the perks is that it gives full nutritional breakdown of the meal AND gives information on the meals based on what post-operative stage you are at!  Talk about great.  :D

Tonight I'm going with Gena to the bariatric surgery support group.  She attended two prior to her surgery, and I believe this is the first one post-op for her.  They meet the first Thursday of each month, and it is mainly people who have already completed the surgery but it is open to those who are pre-op as well.  I'm looking forward to meeting new people and hearing about their experiences.

In other surgery news, my grandma had her surgery this morning to remove the colostomy bag and reattach everything.  The surgery went well and the doctor is very happy with the immediate out-come.  Grandma is going to be sore for a bit as they used the same incision as before, but in several weeks she should be more like her old self again.

Humpday Fun

So this morning as I groggily swatted at my alarm clock to shut it off I had the following thought, "Why is my alarm going off?"  I snuggled back under the covers and had the sudden realization that I had an appointment this morning and that was the reason my alarm went off.  Apparently my brain hadn't decided it was time to function.

The appointment was fine, although in my opinion the doctor was a bit scatterbrained.  I'm kinda glad I don't usually see her.  ;)  The EKG was fine, and they drew four vials of blood for the multitude of tests.  The one that made me laugh the most was the pregnancy test.  Of course this morning was the third time in the past 48 hours I'd been asked if it was possible I was pregnant.  I laughed and told her it wasn't possible and she said (no joke), "That's what Mary said."  Seriously?  If I turn up pregnant I'm gonna be making international news, and something tells me the Catholic Church will be doing all in it's power to disprove divine intervention.  LOL

After being used as a human pin cushion I met with Gena.  She looks really good three weeks after her surgery.  We went to lunch and discussed what she is able to and not to eat at this point.  Then we went for pedicures.  So it was a lovely afternoon.

I did forget to mention yesterday that the time of my surgery has changed.  Originally it was scheduled for 7:30 on the 26th, now it is scheduled for 11:30.  At least I don't have to be at the hospital as early now. :)

More to come soon...

Tests, Day 1

I've been up for 8 hours now, and have surprisingly accomplished quite a bit.  I left the house at 6:00 in order to be at the hospital on time for my 7:30 registration time.  I actually arrived at 7:00 so I got things moving along a little early.  


I had three pre-op tests/requirements today:  A chest x-ray, sonogram and UGI (a type of x-ray/scan where they use dye).  The sonogram was first up, and quite honestly if I don't have bruises from it I'll be surprised.  I realize I'm not a skinny person but the tech seemed to be using excessive force with the scanner thingy.  (Don't you love the technical terminology?)  As much pain as her pushing was the whole "take a deep breath and hold it" thing got a bit old.  Especially the three times she seemed to forget to tell me to exhale.  Blue as a skin color just isn't working for me.  Next up was the chest x-rays, which was a walk in the park.  Then came the fun part, the UGI.  The tech is explaining to me what is going to happen and I sort of understood her but 30 seconds after she finished explaining it all, I had not a thought in my head.  *sigh*  Thankfully the doctor told me what to do and when.  It starts out with standing on a platform and doing a "shot" of this stuff like Alka-Seltzer.  Except you're not allowed to burp.  Then you drink a huge gulp of this nasty white stuff.  Now the real fun begins... suddenly the platform you are standing on reclines into a table - while you're on it!  That was actually the neatest part of it all.  LOL  Then I had to (as the doctor put it) do a "log roll" on the table - completely roll all the way over.  That is so the dye fully coats the stomach.  Then lots of images are done whilst in uncomfortable positions... only to be followed by yet one more nasty liquid.  This one you sip on command while images are taken.  Boy was I happy when that was over.  The doctor was really nice though and tried to make an unpleasant situation fun.  He commented that their variety of cocktails must be really great after not being allowed any food or water since midnight the previous night.  Sure, doc.  LOL


The best part of the morning was chugging the 16 oz of water I'd brought with me after the final test was done.  Then I met with the surgery coordinator and answered a lot of questions and signed paperwork.


Oh, and my annoyance from last night turned out to be nothing.  They do accept credit cards so I'm all paid up.  Go me.


Now I really think a nap is in order...

22 Days

So we've reached the 22 day mark.  To say there aren't any butterflies in my stomach would be a lie.  There are a few flitting about.

Tomorrow is my first round of pre-op tests, and I have to be at the hospital and the outrageous hour of 7:00.  That means leaving my house by 6:00 at the latest.  *sigh*  But that's not the truly annoying part.  What has me fully irked tonight is the fact that I missed an important phone call from the coordinator because I didn't hear my cell phone ring while I was out earlier.  Naturally by the time I got her message she was gone for the day.  So now I may be in a bind tomorrow morning when I arrive and have to make the payment for the hospital.  The issue is this:  she left a message to remind me that payment must be a cashier/bank check and not a personal check.  Now the surgeon's office told me that the hospital would accept payment on credit card, so I had planned to pay it that way.  My bank was already closed by the time I got the message, and they won't be open when I leave the house in the morning.  So I have no clue what is going to happen.  All I know is I'm frustrated.

Here's hoping tomorrow won't be as frustrating as I fear.

2010 the Year of Change

While most rung in the New Year with family and/or friends, most likely with lots of food and drink I was at home with the kitties watching DVDs and chatting online. Why? Because I've been sick since well before Christmas and there was no way in hell I was going out. I'm feeling a bit better today - my third day of antibiotics to help kill the respiratory infection I have. At least the fever finally seems to have gone.

Let me back up momentarily to Wednesday. I had a very early appointment to pick up a CPAP machine. Seems those lovely sleep studies I did in October and November found I have sleep apnea. Chances are the surgery will correct the problem. I'm not sure who has (or does) use a CPAP machine, but they definitely take getting used to, and are probably easier to use when one can already breathe without congestion. Sleeping the last two nights hasn't been easy because I'm having a hard enough time breathing due to my current respiratory problems and then adding on this machine which forces air up your nose constantly... Well, it just isn't happening. I'm managing about three hours a night with the machine before I have to take the mask off. I only hope once I'm healthy again that it won't be so difficult to acclimate to the machine.

So now we're up to date through the here and now. I spent today working on a gift for a friend. Why I thought I have the mental capacity to work on Celtic knotwork right now is beyond me, but so far it is looking good. Hopefully I'll be able to finish it tomorrow and mail it Monday. My other "big plans" for the weekend include laundry and dishes, and if I still have energy after those are done I'll work on getting stuff straightened up in the house. I have so much I need and want to do before my surgery and I'm afraid it won't all get done.

I have two days of pre-op tests this week. Tuesday I'll have all the radiological stuff done (x-rays and the like) and Wednesday I'll have blood work and what is called a pre-op physical. Should be two days full of fun - especially Tuesday when I need to be in NoVA by 7:00a. Yikes! I just keep reminding myself that it's moving me closer to my final goal.